Celebrity jokes

Your mum is so ugly she made Paul Walker run.

choi soobin loml

What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?

I care when my computer crashes.

How did Princess Diana die?

Giving the glove box head.

"Stephen Hawking was talking about a cash register at Costco when he said I can’t stand these people. 😳😳😳😳😳😳 What did he saaaaaaayyyyyyy?"

Ever wonder why pride month is so hot?

It's just a free trial of what's to come for the celebrators...

"FUCK IT HURTS SO BAD PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE I CAN'T BREATHE (I am Paul Walker btw)"

People tell Kobe to fly high, but when he flew high, he died.

Hi, I am Michael Jackson, pronouns are HEE/HEE!

Want to know what Juice WRLD would do if he were alive today?

Frantically scratch on the inside of his coffin.

So Johnny Depp made an appearance on the MTV Video Music Awards as an astronaut. It really looks like he wants to be the new Elon Musk, whatever career path is most viable for Depp. I got to admit, if launching crystal meth into your nostrils and your anus is as viable as launching rockets to Mars, Johnny Depp would surpass Elon Musk in net worth.

Then again, the money Depp spends on alcohol each month, he could have bought all of Michael Bloomberg's penthouses in Manhattan. Sure sounds like he also shares the same financial advisor as Donald Trump, who thought it was a magnificent idea to launch Trump Airlines and Trump Ice. He already shares the same pro-Kremlin lawyer, by the way.

What do you call two Michael J. Fox's standing next to each other?

Parallel Parkinson's.

Why did Stephen Hawking go on to Britain's Got Talent?

To sing.

What do you call Stephen Hawking on fire?

Hot Wheels.

Who's the closest family member to Paul Walker?

Answer: The tree.

Donald Trump is so stupid his fanboys dislike this.

Who’s the hottest girl in the world?

Babe Ruth cuz she catches the sun.

Why don’t rappers ever get cold?

Because they have so many fans!

Why was the rapper always the first one at the party?

Because he never missed a beat!

Mariah Carey is a more legit rapper than rapboat.