Celebrity jokes
What is Bill Cosby's favorite poem? Roses are red, my cum is blue, I'll wait till your asleep to rape you.
Today, my family visited Disneyland. When we got to the hall of fame, I was shocked to find a statue of the BielefeldMan.
The tour guide said, "That’s Lewandisney. He owns the biggest collection of Disney TAP-INS and is a Mickey Mouse clubhouse member." Well done Lewandisney!
Chuck Norris once won a race against Usain Bolt, running in the opposite direction around the track, blindfolded, on one foot.
What’s the difference between Micheal Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is plastic and dangerous for children to play with, the other is used for carrying groceries.
Do you remember what Bruce Willis' last movies were?
Neither does he.
What do Diddy and Turkish men have in common?
They both use lots of oil.
Who is the new heterosexual Michael Joseph Jackson (pedophile)?
R. Kelly.
Paul's favorite car.
A Carrera GT.
Imagine Michael Jackson having kids? Would they come out Black or white or plastic?
When I was your age, we had Wacko Jacko, not Florida Man.
Why did the Secret Service detain Johnny Depp at the White House?
Because he was about to kick the cabinet.
How do you know when Kobe Bryant is famous?
His face was chiseled in a mountain.
Michael J. Fox walks into the grocery store to buy some salt. When he comes out, a kid turns to his mother and says, "Look mom, a salt shaker!"
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
Why are Michael Jackson and caviar so much in common?
They both come on little white crackers.
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
What do you call a chubby Robert Pattinson? The Fatman.
For Charlie D'Amelio fans, my basement is your home now. Leave a like if you agree with me.
Why did Michael Jackson go to jail? He was feeling a little Randy.
Chuck Norris didn't join the army, the army joined Chuck Norris.