Celebrity jokes
Why did Michael Jackson dangle a baby over a balcony?
He wanted to clean out the blanket.
What do Michael Jackson and Linus have in common? They both carry a little blanket.
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
Who did Michael Jackson want to be like? The man in the mirror.
Memes
Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.
What's the difference between a rubber and Michael Jackson? Nothing, kids touch them both.
Q: What was the last thing Kurt Cobain said to Courtney Love before he died?
A: “Holes gonna be big.”
How do you get a boy to share something? Bring in Michael Jackson's bed.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Did you know that people say Michael Jackson only became a pedophile when he was white?
Lucky for him, if he was black he would have been found guilty.
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.
Michael Jackson, who's terrified of adult women, once had a girlfriend, but broke it off with her. When she asked him why, he said, "It's not you, it's me-hee-hee."
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
Yo momma's so fat, her shirt size has more X's than Taylor Swift.
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁