Celebrity jokes
Why did Michael Jackson allow little boys to sleep in his house? Because he's bad.
Yo mama so fat that Will Smith could slap her from a mile away.
I work as an IT technician. The other day, I had to fix Cristiano Ronaldo’s laptop. He pointed to a message on the screen saying, “Do you consent to cookies?” He said that he doesn’t eat cookies and doesn’t know what consent means, so that’s why he called me.
How do you know Johnny Depp finished his meal?
When you see fifty empty bottles of wine on his front doorstep.
Yo momma's so fat, her shirt size has more X's than Taylor Swift.
Michael Jackson, who's terrified of adult women, once had a girlfriend, but broke it off with her. When she asked him why, he said, "It's not you, it's me-hee-hee."
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
What does Michael Jackson and Chef from South Park have in common?
They both say "Hello children!"
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
How do you get a boy to share something? Bring in Michael Jackson's bed.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
What do Santa Claus and Bill Cosby have in common?
They both come while you’re asleep.
What does Michael Jackson like to eat? Little wieners.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite snack? 5 year old whiners.
Did you know that people say Michael Jackson only became a pedophile when he was white?
Lucky for him, if he was black he would have been found guilty.
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
Did you know Paul Walker had dandruff? Neither did I til I seen his Head and Shoulders on the dashboard.
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
How many times does Ariana Grande knock at the door?
She doesn’t, she just uses 7 rings.