Celebrity jokes
What was Michael Jackson's favorite word to say to parents and tabloids? "Leave me alone."
What did Michael Jackson say before he died, as far as his childhood? "This is it."
Who did Michael Jackson want to be like? The man in the mirror.
Why didn't Michael Jackson date 25 year olds?
Because there were only 20 of them.
Why does Michael Jackson like 44-year-olds? There's 4 of them.
Memes
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Chuck Norris' dick is so big that it has its own dick. And his dick's dick is still bigger than Bruce Lee.
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
Race car backwards is race car, but if you turn race car sideways, that’s how Paul Walker got sent to God’s inbox.
What time is bedtime at Michael Jackson’s house?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
What's the difference between Wacko Jacko and Elvis Presley?
14 number 1 hits.
How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
Out of a catalogue. 😁
Why does Michael Jackson do positions with kids in photos? Because they won’t do the same for him.
How many times does Ariana Grande knock at the door?
She doesn’t, she just uses 7 rings.
What did death say during a helicopter crash?
KOBE!
What is it called when Bill Cosby and an illegal immigrant fight?
Aliens vs. Predator
So my teacher's daughter committed suicide.
One day I'ma go up to her and say, "What's wrong, did Logan Paul leave your daughter hanging?"
What’s Stephen Hawking’s favorite band? The Rolling Stones.
Your forehead's so big that Michael Jackson could moonwalk across that b*tch.