Celebrity jokes
How did Princess Diana die?
Giving the glove box head.
How did Rihanna know that Chris Brown was cheating on her? There was a different color of lipstick on his knuckles.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a computer?
I give a fuck if my computer crashes.
What is Johnny Depp's new legal name?
Johnny in debt.
Who did Michael Jackson want to be like? The man in the mirror.
Charlie Chaplin and Tork Poettschke meet.
Chaplin: "What can I do for you?"
Poettschke: "Please get away from me."
What do you call a chubby Robert Pattinson? The Fatman.
How do you know when you're near Wacko Jacko's grave? When 'Thriller' is out and about.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Little boys turn them on.
Why did Michael Jackson run?
Because he lost his glove.
*walks in store* OH LITTle debhehe's!
Why can’t orphans celebrate Christmas?
Because they have no family.
I was gonna tell you a Kobe Bryant joke.
But it would just crash and burn.
Chuck Norris is the opposite to Oliver Savage.
Biggest joke?
[Image of Zac Efron]
Why can't orphans celebrate Christmas?
Father Christmas left them.
What's the one thing that you don't have but celebrities do?
Lots of fans.
Yo mama so ugly, she made One Direction go the other direction.
What's the difference between vitiligo and plastic surgery?
Vitiligo doesn't alter facial features.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to screw a lightbulb?
Tell Jacko that the bulb is a 6-year-old boy.