Celebrity jokes
Katy Perry can't sing, can't dance, doesn't write music, is unbelievably ugly, and is unable to decipher maths or science. Really though, I didn't realize going down on a record executive would later lead her to be one of the people able to go to space.
The time when Michael Jackson came in his pajamas during the trial. Whether or not it was because he saw a 7-year-old boy has yet to be determined.
When you hear Michael Jackson talk about his "perfect 10," make sure you hide your 10-year-old son.
Juice WRLD really died, then how is he posting videos today?
When Mother Teresa went to heaven, she was greeted by Saint Peter with a halo for her dedication to the needy. After walking around for a while, she saw Lady Diana with a bigger halo. She got angry at Lady Diana and went to Saint Peter and asked him why she had a bigger one, and Saint Peter said, "Oh, that’s not a halo, that’s a steering wheel."
I told my friend that we should dress up as P. Diddy and Drake for Halloween and ask parents if their kid wants to come over for a sleepover.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
Paul Walker started in 3 movies: Fast and Furious, Gone in 60 Seconds, To Die Hard.
What did the man say in the morning after beating up his wife?
"I woke up Chris Breezy."
How many Kardashians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One really small one and one really small black guy.
What has eight legs and doesn’t rape children?
The Jackson 4.
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
What's the difference between Derek Boogaard and Kurt Cobain? Nothing, they were both fucked in the brain when they died.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."
What did Bill Cosby say on the second date?
"Hi, nice to meet you."
It's telling that Ye gets more offended when he's called a gayfish than a Nazi.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
What is the difference between the Twin Towers and Elton John?
Elton John is still standing.