Celebrity jokes
What's Michael Jackson's favorite thing to do when nobody's home?
Beat it.
“Life is going swimmingly,”
“Tell that to Whitney Houston.”
Did you hear? There is a new toy for boys ages 2-10. It's called Jackson. A tiny white doll, with black Jackson. Get it while supplies last.
If a prostitute is celebrating her birthday, does she get a hoecake?
Q. What does Michael Jackson get his sex partners as a gift?
A. Crayons.
Donald Trump is to white Americans as O.J. Simpson is to black Americans. They will never choose to convict these people even if they murdered or raped.
Canada is the Keanu Reeves of countries. Too bad the US is the Kanye West of countries instead of the Dolly Parton of countries.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite things to say to little boys? "I'd really love to see you-hoo-hoo tonight," and "I can't smile without you-hoo-hoo."
What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.
Why can't Michael Jackson go within 500m of a school zone?
Because he's dead.
Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.
What's the difference between vitiligo and plastic surgery?
Vitiligo doesn't alter facial features.
What did Michael Jackson say when dinner was ready? Ea-ea-eat.
What does Michael Jackson say when it gets hot?
He-he-eat!
Why didn't Michael Jackson have a girlfriend? He's afraid of women.
What pronouns does Michael Jackson use? Hee/hee.
Who is the new heterosexual Michael Joseph Jackson (pedophile)?
R. Kelly.
Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.
What does Michael Jackson like?
Teabags.
What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.