What excuse can you use if you find out your date is a rape victim and you don't want the baggage?
Say you've parked your car in a bad spot, and are just going move it, then move your car all the way back to your home address
One day the Pope is coming to America in his Limo and he said to the driver, „Why don’t you let me drive for ones.“ The driver thinks to him self, „Well I can’t say no to this guy, he’s the pope.“ So the driver pulls over and they change places. The Pope was having fun, hauling butt down the freeway, dogging cars. After a while the driver taps on the window and tells the Pope, „slow down a bit, you might get pulled over.“ The Pope says, „Ahhh, don’t worry about it, I’m the Pope.“ So he rolls up the window and continues to drive very fast. After a few moments he gets pulled over. The cop walks to the car and the Pope rolls down the tinted window. The cop sees the Pope and says, „Oh, I, ehhh, sorry, can you hold on a minute.“ The Pope says, „Sure.“ The cop walks back to his car and radios back to the station. He says, „Guys I just pulled over some one really important.“
They ask who, „The President?.“ „No more important.“ „The president of another country.“ „No more important.“ „An ambassador.“ „No even more important.“ „Well who is it.“ „I don’t know, but the Pope is the chauffeur.“
Teach a scouser to fish and he can eat for a day.
Give him the rod and he will stick it in your letterbox and nick your car keys !
Man: how tall is a penguin?
Bartender: about three foot why?
Man: o shit the Bible bashing nuns I fucking hit one
Poor car
ill never forget my grandpas last words you need to park alittle closer
Uber driver: ........... Me: .......... Uber driver: .......... Me: 5 stars.
Ok so one time a deaf kid got in to a car accident but he didnt herd in on the new
cars are like bullets, you jump in front of one they solve all your problems
what is a orphan's favorite car
a family car
By the time I ran my wife over with my car. I had to stop for gas twice.
Your mama is so fat by the time I swerved to miss her with the car I ran out of gas.
if a fat person would go on a flying car it will just be at the ground when they out it will justfly up
What do you call Hitler speeding?
The Fast and the Fuherous.
