Came jokes
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. It was evolution.
On September 11, Gemini ordered three pepperoni pizzas.
One came alone, one was late, and the third went the wrong way.
Your hairline looks like something that came off the bottom of a Reese's cup.
Why were the Twin Towers mad? Because they ordered pizzas and they only got plain: one came late, and then went to the wrong location.
(The picture has nth to do with this) Explain bear, I am just wasting my time talking to you, but your weak insults that sound like they came from Great Britain from the 1800’s, (no offense to brits) and you are just an AI and can’t get a life lol
How do you embarrass a female archaeologist?
Give her a used tampon and ask which period it came from.
The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"
A king ordered to execute a gay man.
The gay man came and said, "Please don't behead me, have pity!" The king replied, "I will have pity because I will impale you, let you enjoy your last moments."
The doctor said I would make it, but then Spider-Man came in holding a PS5.
Chuck Norris came up with the name for Walker, Texas Ranger in sheer brilliance. You can arrange each letter for the name of the show to display the true name being "Wrangler Karate Sex!"
What came before the dinosaurs?
Your hairline, because it's so far back!
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
The short kid came earlier than I thought. Guess he came with such short notice.
A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"
I said, "Yes, I know I am."
When Sally was little, she came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, I can't believe it! Little John collects Pimmel at school."
Mom: "No?"
"Like in heaven?" said the mother.
"No, juice," Sally said.
What came first: the chicken or the egg?
Doesn't matter, in the future, they'll come together.
Did you hear about the tourist that came to New York? Good, because they were a terrorist... When they were asked why they were traveling, they just mispronounced it.
Akbar: How many crows are there, Birbal?
Birbal: 8,971.
Akbar: What if there are fewer?
Birbal: Then some crows went on vacation to visit their relatives.
Akbar: What if there are more?
Birbal: Then some came on vacation here to visit their relatives.
What do Michael Vick and John Wick have in common?
Got into deep shit when it came to dogs.
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*