Came jokes
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.
My girlfriend broke up with me, so I decided to take her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Why couldn’t the peanut finish the project?
Work came to a grinding halt.
I’m going back to the house to get some stuff for my dad, and then I’m going to have a car and a birthday party come up for the weekend at the end of the week. I was going to get my birthday cake for the day.
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
(The picture has nth to do with this) Explain bear, I am just wasting my time talking to you, but your weak insults that sound like they came from Great Britain from the 1800’s, (no offense to brits) and you are just an AI and can’t get a life lol
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because no one came back with any.
Hi Freshfry, hi Alex, I did not see your messages yesterday because I was at my brother's soccer game, and then people came to our house till 11:00. Lol, sorry :)
Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
A chair came to life and said, "I'm alive!"
I said, "Yes, I know I am."
Yo mama so ugly, when she entered the scare factory, she came out with a job application.
Did you hear about the tourist that came to New York? Good, because they were a terrorist... When they were asked why they were traveling, they just mispronounced it.
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. It was evolution.
Your hairline looks like something that came off the bottom of a Reese's cup.
Your mum is so fat, when she was sitting on a scale, the number couldn't even fit on the scale and came shooting out!
Akbar: How many crows are there, Birbal?
Birbal: 8,971.
Akbar: What if there are fewer?
Birbal: Then some crows went on vacation to visit their relatives.
Akbar: What if there are more?
Birbal: Then some came on vacation here to visit their relatives.
When Sally was little, she came home from school and said to her mother, "Mom, I can't believe it! Little John collects Pimmel at school."
Mom: "No?"
"Like in heaven?" said the mother.
"No, juice," Sally said.
My friend was getting bullied so I went over and asked him to stop. It went a little bit like this:
Me: Dude, leave her alone. Him: Beat it, b*tch. *lots of arguing and swearing* Me: Ya know! The smartest thing that ever came outta your mouth was probably a penis. Him: *walks away*
A man comes to a bar and has a drink. Then his bully came to him and stole his drink. Then the bully asked, "What's wrong?"
The man said that "I'm trying to kill myself. I tried getting hit by a train, but the train went on a different track. Then I tried to jump off a bridge, but I fell on a boat full of pillows. Then I tried to poison myself."
Then the bully says, "Then what?" Then the man replied, "You just drank it." Then the man left.
One time an ant was collecting food. Suddenly, a wind pushed the ant into the river. The ant said, "Help! Help!" and a pigeon heard it. Then, he grabbed a leaf and threw it in the river. The ant climbed on it, and then the pigeon and the ant became best friends. But one time, a hunter came to kill the pigeon. When the ant saw him, she bit his leg and the pigeon flew away from the arrow, and that's how friends are, everybody.