Call jokes

Hello guys, imagine if we had no school and we get to do whatever we want without parents telling us what to do! What place would you want to call it and what would the fun things we get to do be? I would call it "Happy world for kids." Leave a comment telling me what it would be called! Enjoy! :)

So, some ants in a colony go to war. They want some more troops and know that there are ants that went to wars as well. They call them war-ants.

They start barging into homes to search for more war-ants. They barge into a home, and the lady-ant goes, "Hey, why are you here? Can you please leave?" One of the ants replies with, "I'm sorry, but unless you have a war-ant, we have to keep searching your house."

What do you call a guy in a wheelchair smoking weed?

A baked potato.

Why's it called a Caesar Salad?

'Cause Caesar ruled the romaines.

My uncle is a computer genius! The police even called him a PDF file!

If a man kills a kid, it's called Murder.

If a woman kills a kid, it's called Reproductive Rights.

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What do you call a herd of cows masturbating?

Beef strokin' off.

I called my boss the other Monday and told him I needed the day off because I was sick. He said, "How sick?"

I said, "Well, I'm in bed with my 12-year-old sister."

What do you call a pen with no head?

DeCAPitated.

What do you call a person with Down syndrome who graduated high school?

Impossible!

Me: U know the show called Imagine Dragons?

Friends: No, what is it?

Me: Imagine dragon this nuts across yo mouth.

If you throw a nun, is it called a... Nunchuck???

What do you call two redheads on Mars?

Locals.

Why do orphans go to church so much?

So they can have someone to call father.

Q: What do you call a guy with no arms or legs in front of a door?

A: Mat.

What do you call a violent fish?

A smackeral!

What do you call a duck on drugs?

A quackhead.

What do you call a gay scientist? Stephen Hawqueen.

What do you call it when a girl on her period goes swimming?

A blood bath.