Call jokes
What do you call a skunk falling from the sky?
A stink bomb!
What do you call a cup with a handle?
A mug! HAHA ha... My parents just got a divorce :(
What do you call a bear without an ear?
B.
An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called "Lenin in Poland." When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests.
The painting depicts Lenin's wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky.
"But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?" asks one of the guests.
"Lenin is in Poland," replies the painter.
What do you call pedophiles on a beach? Pedos in Speedos.
Memes
What do you call an old black person? Farming antique.
What do you call a depressed tree?
A wood cutter.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
What do the Spanish people call child abuse? Pedrophile.
What do you call a bunch of Paki's jumping off a cliff?
Chocolate drops.
What do you call a black person with a gun? Black ops.
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)
If a deaf person is at court, then is it still called a hearing?
What do you call an owl with armor?
A Knight Owl!
There is a feminist group in my town.
It is called Gal-Qaeda.
(I actually got this from The Simpsons, so credit to the show.)
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in a pile of leaves? Russel.
What do you call a Russian prostitute? Slobadown Mycockyoubitch.
What do you call a sad, depressed artist? Anything but "Cows of Woe".
Friend 1: What's your favorite drink or food?
Friend 2: Pizza.
Friend 3: Donuts.
Friend 4: I don't eat food but I do drink bleach.
Friend 1: (calling the suicide hotline)
Friend 2: (Calling the parents)