Call jokes
Yo mama so hairy that the zookeepers called a code red thinking an ape got loose.
Do they call it rapeseed oil because it is lube?
What do you call a school bus that you cannot drive?
A friend.
If you think the guy calling you fat is offensive,
Try salad 🥗.
Elmo in 2022 is called "Tickle My Balls Elmo."
What do you call a guy who has sex on the Moon?
An “Astronut”!
People call my blind friend dumb sometimes.
She can't see the obvious.
Your mama is so ugly! Ghostface from Scream won't even make that call!
If you have a pair and it runs around the street, what do you call it? A running pair.
What do you call a pillow that has been on the bed for 20 years in jail?
A criminal! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃
What do you call a Jedi that can use the force to fly?
A Jedi Flight.
What do you call it when tectonic plates start racing?
Continental Drift.
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
What do you call a wild cow in a shop with old things?
A bull in a china shop.
"Prince???? Where are you??? I might have to go to bed for real, but I just wish we could talk at night. Why don't we anyway? (I love you so much!)"
An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.
Why is it that if you donate a kidney, people love you? But if you donate five kidneys, they call the police.
My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.
What do you call sex?
Making cake.
What did the cops say when someone called him racist?
"How can I be racist? My wife's eye is black."
If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.
What do you call a lazy potato chip? Lays!