What do you call a funny mountain?
Hill-arious.
Call Jokes
What do you call a prostitute with no arms or legs?
Cash and carry.
What do you call Dr. Disrespect on top of a building?
Diddler on the Roof.
My friend Liam has a hairline [if you can even call it a hairline] so bad it keeps going back for miles.
Yo mama is so fat, when she saw the Titanic, she called it small.
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
What do you call a 100-year-old frog?
An old croak!
The doctor said he had good news and bad news. The good news is that you have 24 hours to live. The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday.
What do you call an arrow pointing the wrong way?
A Disap point ment.
What do you call a magic owl?
HOOdini
What do you call a ghost bee?
Boobees.
What do you call a large lamp that does illicit things to young children?
A Jacko Lantern!
Me: Hey, how are you?
Depression: I'm doing fine. We are just looking for a home :3
Insomnia: Mommy, can we get a home?
Anxiety: Insomnia, wait for mommy to finish.
Depression: Anyway, here is my resume!
Me: Okie, thank you. Ok... mhmmm... WOW! Okie, this is a nice resume! (Didn't Read it...)
Depression: Also, I have two more friends that want to move in too!
Me: Ok, and their names?
Depression: Their names are: PTSD and Trauma!
Me: Ok, they seem fine (Doesn't know about them)
Depression: Okie, here is the money (a penny :(). Thank you, we will call you if we need anything.
Me: Ok, see you soon! :3
Me now hates my life. :)
Disney just released a new film about a poor kid with cancer. It’s called Finding Chemo.
What do you call a Native American with a boner?
A redwood.
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a copycat.
What do you call a steak that tastes bad?
A MISsteak.
I got a phone call from a guy labeled "assassin" saying my life will end soon. I seriously doubt that he w- *gunshot*
What do you call a pregnant slave? A two for one deal.
What do you call suicidal Hitler?
Slitler.
