Call jokes

What do you call a dick that's too small to see?

Tick-tack dick.

- What do you call a bee who flew to United States? - "USB"

Pep called; they want their unpadded bra back.

What do you call a person without a nose and who doesn't know much?

Nose-less.

What do you call a dictionary on drugs?

High definition or addictionary.

What does a 911 call receiver say when they get a call?

"9 Juan Juan, who this?"

Grandma: calls You: Hello Grandma, what are you doing? Why, you can't mean I'm right in the house right now? Grandma: I didn't mean to call you, bye.

Why was the beach salty? Because the land didn't wave back. The ocean then called the land a beach.

What do you call a dog wearing a beret?

Smeargle!

What would you call a mom cat and a kitten walking together?

KIT-KAT :p

What do you call funny waves? Wave Chappelle.

What do you call someone without a body?

Nobody.

What do you call Bill Tran?

Stupid noob.

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A can't opener.

"What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?"

"Sofishticated."

I went to an interview and my future boss said, "Hi, my name is Watt Niseto, meet you."

Then said, "WHAT IS UR NAME?" He then said,

"What is not my name, Watt is." So I replied, "Ugh fine, I guess I'll call you Wha." Then he said, "Wha I not my name."

And then I said, "Ugh fine, my name is Will Knott." He then replied, "Hi Will Not."

What do you call a squirrel that flies? A flying squirrel.

One day Billy, Bob, and Doo Da went fishing in a small boat. None of them could swim, and they had no life jackets.

Doo Da suddenly started yelling, "I got one boys!" as he started trying to reel the fish in. It was way too large for him to get onto the boat, and he fell into the water. The fish had a nice meal that night. Billy and Bob were in shock but knew they had to tell Mrs. Doo Da.

Upon arriving at her house, they did rock, paper, scissors on who had to tell her the news. Bob lost. He slowly rang the doorbell, and Mrs. Doo Da answered. "U-uhm.. we...Doo D-Da..f-fish..." Bob stuttered, then he screamed and ran off. Billy went to go retrieve his friend. Billy had a nice little talk with him and slapped him across the face to get him to just say what happened. Soon, the two men returned to Mrs. Doo Da's house and rang the doorbell again. She opened the door and looked at the two men and asked, "I've been trying to call Doo Da, and he hasn't answered, is he ok?" Bob took a deep breath and took a step forward with a smile on his face. He sang, "We went fishing, guess who died, Doo Da, Doo Da. He smiled and he said good bye, we mourn Doo Da today."

What do you call a bunch of people near each other?

The start of the Hollacoast.

Hannes asks his mother, "Mom, why are the peanuts called peanuts?" Mom replies, "Because they grow in the earth." Hannes replies, "Then why don't strawberries grow in the earth?" Mom replies: "The giraffes originally had a short neck, but it has grown from giraffe to giraffe. The same thing happened with the strawberries. They grew in the earth and grew higher from harvest to harvest until at some point their stems protruded from the earth." Hannes replies, "Then why is my neck so short?" The mother replies: "So many people died in the First and Second World Wars that our necks could not develop at all. It was the same in the Thirty Years' War. We humans have been in so many wars. The giraffes in none and that's why our neck is so short."