Call it jokes
They all call it self-baptism. I call it failed suicide.
I gave the blind kid a gun and called it a hair dryer.
What do you call it when a lizard can’t get a boner?
Ereptile Dysfunction!
If a girl jumps off a cliff, some people call it suicide and some call it girl power, but I call it BULLSHIT.
What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?
Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."
Kid to daddy: "Why do they call it Uranus?"
Daddy to kid: "Cause, son, it's Uranus."
Men should pay for the first date, that’s why it’s called a (men)u.
Then women should do the dishes, that’s why they call it a dish wash(her).
The inventor of the umbrella was just going to call it "brella," but he hesitated.
What do you call it when a man gets high in Panera Bread?
Panera sped.
You call him the holy cross. I call it the rejected Smash character.
What do you call it when an orphan takes a picture?
A family portrait.
What do you call it when two Mexicans fight?
Juan on Juan.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and called it "Hot Wheels."
What do you call it when you drop a bottle of food dye?
"It's dye-ing."
What do you call nitrogen in the day? You call it day-trogen!
I bought a new shotgun the other day. Want to know what I called it?
Kurt Cobain's microphone.
Why do they call it America when literally nothing is free?
Your forehead is so big that we may as well call it a fivehead.
What does a physicist call it when a suicidal person is high up? Potential energy.
Why is arson so fun?
IT'S A FIRE ACTIVITY!
HAHAHAHAHAHAPAHAAHAHIIRTAASIISISISHRNHHTHTHTHHNHSHSNIHTAHE
Day 83 of being trapped in þis room. I made a language. I call it hertof. I speak wiþ þe walls now.