Call it

Call it jokes

Day

6 views ·

Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".

Charity

120 views ·

I'm starting a new charity where homosexuals help the extremely handicapped.

I'm calling it "Fruits and Vegetables".

Drug

1,195 views ·

Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.

Puberty

61 views ·

God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.

Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.

God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.

Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!

God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)

Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)

God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!

God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........

God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.

  • 1
  • Religion

    75 views ·

    When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.

    But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)

  • 2
  • Mom

    25 views ·

    What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?

    Transparent.

    Cow

    17 views ·

    What do you call a cow with no legs? (Ground Beef!) No, a cow! The absence of legs does not change the fact that the species is still a cow!

    What do you call a DOG with no legs? (A dog?) It doesn't matter what you call it, as it's never going to come.

  • 0
  • Rape

    120 views ·

    There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.