Call it jokes

If Jesus was real, they wouldn’t call it the crucifixion. They would call it crucifact.

What do you call it when a drunk cowgirl falls off her stool at the bar?

A hoedown.

What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?

And microtransaction.

What do you call it when Hitler puts retards in the oven? Baked potatoes.

God: Ok, so I created adults. And I created how they are supposed to look from being born to preteen.

Satan: (slides in) I’ll take over for you, pops.

God: I dunno... this is very delicate work. Just one wrong thing can ruin the system.

Satan: Don’t worry your beard off! (Pats his back) I’ll just do the ages from 12 to 18!

God: Hmm... I’m still not- (Gets a call on his phone) Shoot, I got to take this. (Answers call) Don’t touch anything, Lucifer! (Walks away)

Satan:.......(just touches lightly, and alarms start blaring. He squeaks and runs away)

God: (rushes in) WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!?!

God: (tries fixing problems. Only gets alarms off) Fuck me........

God:....(sighs) Fine, it’ll stay. We’ll just call it....puberty.

Q: What do you call it when four Mexicans drown in quicksand?

A: Cuatro Cinco.

What do you call it when a man is scared in Panera Bread?

Panera dread.

When someone has an imaginary friend, you call them weird and crazy.

But when a group of people have an imaginary friend, you call it religion. :)

What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?

Transparent.

what do you call it when a person dies in Panera Bread?

Panera dead.

What do you call a cow with no legs? (Ground Beef!) No, a cow! The absence of legs does not change the fact that the species is still a cow!

What do you call a DOG with no legs? (A dog?) It doesn't matter what you call it, as it's never going to come.

There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

What do you call it when Hitler abuses his wife?

Adolf Hit Her.

What do you call it when everyone of your friends makes too many dumb Covid jokes? A pundemic.

What do you call it when a chameleon won't change colors?

A reptile dysfunction.

In 2021, we won't need an April Fool's prank. Just think of Joe Biden and call it a day.

"I had raped the game young, you can call it statutory." - Kanye West in 2009 (Forever with Drake, Eminem, and Lil Wayne)

What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?

You just got fruit-rolled.

What do you call it when an Arab girl has an abortion?

Removing a bomb.

I'm going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!