But jokes

The twins ordered pepperoni, but they got plain.

Stephen Hawking can pass any test, but there's one test he can't pass. It is the PACER test.

Tell rumors about me, but please don't say I'm in a love relationship.

I told a joke at a funeral, but no one laughed. One mf was ded though💀.

My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.

She said help, so I kicked her.

I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.

Call me fat? You call me fat because you think that you’re pretty, but you ain’t. You’re just a musty, dusty, rusty Cardi B.

The way ladies cheat nowadays is very alarming.

She might give birth to twins, but each twin having a different father. 😭

If you get a new bed, you have more bedroom, but less bedroom.

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

Once the old lady told me she had wisdom, but after she voted! 🤯

I heard a motivational quote saying faith can move mountains, but faith cannot move your receding hairline.

Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.

What's white but not black, and red all over?

J. K. Rowling after attending the world premiere of the next Matrix movie.

Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.

Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.

I'm sorry, but I can only process text. Please provide the joke as text.

Why was the orphan so successful? They said "go big or go home," but he could not do the second.

If I had a dime for everytime the Australian president shat himself in a McDonald's, I would have one dime, which is not a lot, but it's weird that it happened.

I used to have a son, but he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died. For inspiration.

There’s no “I” in team, but there is a “U” in cunt.