But jokes

I’d tell BlessedBrian to aim for the stars, but it seems like his GRAVITATIONAL PULL is holding him back.

Leo is like Monday mornings... everyone dreads her, but we're forced to deal with her anyway.

I may not be your cup of tea, but I am definitely your 10th shot of tequila.

I'm what they call a ✨️askhole✨️.

A person who will consistently ask for your advice and wisdom, but then proceed to do the exact opposite of what you say.

I'd make a 9/11 joke, but it wouldn't fly anymore.

And if I tried it, it would probably crash and burn.

It just wouldn't help my comedy career take off.

I was playing hide-n-seek with my dad and he hid, but I could never find him till this day.

Thanks Ethan for all you've done. We've both made mistakes when all is said and done, but just thanks for being a good friend. This is officially my last post on here, Ethan-Real 1.

Japan takes credit for creating the rice cooker, but they forgot the USA made the largest one in 1945 and sent it to Japan.

My uncle is a horrible ventriloquist. He put his hand up my butt, but he told me NOT to say anything.

Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.

When it's NNN but you have a peanut allergy: 🥳

Why were the Twin Towers made on 9/11? They ordered pepperoni pizza but got plane.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because seven ate nine.

But 10 was afraid, why? Because it was in between 9 and 11.

In 9/11, people were dying for the pizza. But it was at the bottom, so they had to die for it literally.

I wasn't gonna tell another Epstein joke but I didn't want to leave anyone hanging.

You know all these hairline jokes are good but are very rude, but your hairline is built like the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

My wife and I watched the movie Indecent Proposal last night. Afterwards, I asked her if she'd sleep with Robert Redford for $1,000,000. She said, "Sure, but where am I gonna get that kind of money?"

I'm not saying you're annoying.

But if a yeast infection were a person, it would be you.

Obama has dih.

But the Twin Towers just had a hard landing.

I say we shouldn’t do any jokes about dogs cause dogs are the best, but cats suck.