But jokes

Gf: Babe, do you love me?

Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.

Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...

Bf: Exactly.

Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.

You know how you mine and craft in Minecraft, and you chat in VR in VR Chat, but what do you do in Alabama?

I tried my best using phone sex online, but the thing about it is the holes cannot fit through.

Hey, wake up. I just murdered your family, but I live alone.

Then who are these people in your house? They are people in my house? Well, not anymore, dumb bitch. You're welcome, you could have died.

I know how unicorns make babies. The dad puts his horn in the girl's butt hole.

I love playing zebra crossing, but I always get run over.

All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.

I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.

What falls but never gets hurt? Snow.

What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?

A KIDNey!

High school students are also more interesting to see, but they are you on your way. Just kidding! 🤣

Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”

Repost

Did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie!

I'm bone dry in material, but I have a skeleTON of skeleton jokes. After I tell you all these rib ticklers, you will have a bone to pick with if you didn't find that funny, you outta rip my spine out.

I used to hate facial hair,

but then it grew on me.

I always feel better when my doctor says something is normal for my age, but then think dying will also be normal for my age at some point.

A doctor slept with one of his patients and thought to himself, "This is wrong, but some doctors do it..." He is a vet.

What do you call a sad Doge?

What?

Nothing but Sarrrooooddd!

An alien goes to Area 51, but I wonder why he doesn't go to your house?

I would tell a clock joke, but I don't have time.

I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.