But jokes

"Hey, I heard you were a bit down—where's John?"

"He died."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, but I got you food."

(After they eat) "Hey, how did John taste seasoned and cooked?"

I tried to give directions to an orphan, but he got lost because there was no home.

I remember you. You used to be an ash.

I would love to roast you more, but my mom said to not burn trash.

Call me fat? You call me fat because you think that you’re pretty, but you ain’t. You’re just a musty, dusty, rusty Cardi B.

I was at a funeral and made a joke. No one laughed, but someone died.

I'm 17, right? Anyways, the other day my parents told me a joke they made 17 years ago, but they still haven't told the joke yet.

Nobody notices your pain, tears, struggles, but why do they notice your mistakes?

I was going to tell my dad a joke, but he still hasn't come back with the milk yet.

People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the Twin Towers, he will pop up.

Also, my mom's great grandpa killed Hitler.

Why are the Twin Towers mad?

They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.

I got a PS5 for my nine-year-old sister. At the time, I thought it was the best trade I’d ever made. But now I’m regretting not being able to molest her anymore.

I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!

Hello everyone, now a question to make it in there is no right or wrong answer, but who here has watched fireb0rn??

My mate caught me sniffing his disabled sister's knickers the other day. It wouldn't have been so bad, but she was wearing them at the time. It made the rest of the funeral so awkward.

I hate jokes about 9/11... every joke has the tendency to crash and burn.

"I didn't get the joke at first, but then it hit me like a plane," the joke was so dark a cop almost shot it.

Erin like TJ, but his tapeline said no.

Yesterday my mom forgot to go grocery shopping, and I was starving, so I kept opening the fridge about 100 times, but nothing new was in there.

McNeill's mom wrote a shopping list for supper:

cabbage _50

Carrots-50

Cooking fat -100

Onions_20

Tomato-20

salt-10

Total=250

She gave McNeill the list to get the ingredients.

McNeill took long to return home from the shopping.

His mom decided to call McNeill to ask why are taking long. McNeill answered, "I have all the ingredients, but I'm looking for total."

Once the old lady told me she had wisdom, but after she voted! 🤯

Dr. Fauci would be surprised to know that R. Kelly didn't catch COVID-19.

But since COVID is 19, it's too old for him.