But jokes

I don't know an orphan joke, but I bib cried last night.

Because I am an orphan.

There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.

Sorry but, no one asked.

I would make a joke, but it won't be as explosive as the others.

Did you know Princess Diana's last dress she wore was white? But afterwards, it was red.

There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.

How do you know when your wife is dead?

The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.

Everybody asks, "What's up?" but nobody asks, "What's down?"

I try and try every day, but 5 keep coming out. There's so money at this point my walls are built of babies.

The orphan turned 18, but he was happy because he didn't have to pay rent to his parents.

A Russian, a Brit, and a terrorist are in an air balloon.

First, the Russian says, "I dare to throw a stone down!" So he does that, but the others don't seem to be impressed. So the Brit says, "I dare to throw a brick down!" So again he does that, the Russian is impressed, but the terrorist laughs and says, "I dare to throw a bomb down!" So he does that and everybody can't believe what they have just seen. So a bit further, they land, and a shocked and afraid little boy comes running up to them. So they ask what happened, on which the little boy said, "I farted and my school exploded."

I was high in high school, but not as high as the people jumping from the buildings.

Why were the Twin Towers workers disappointed? Because they ordered a ham and cheese, but all they got was a plane.

At 9/11, the people in the Twin Towers ordered pizza. They asked for pepperoni, but instead got plane.

If you buy two condoms, but you're banging a woman, it's fine, don't throw it away, just make her transgender.

I dunno man, worked for me.

Why did the Twin Towers get mad?

They ordered pepperoni pizza, but got plane.

Why were the Twin Towers angry?

Because they ordered pepperoni, but they only got plane!

A: Why are you so sad?

B: I was watching porn, and all of a sudden my wife opened the door.

A: Ok, I see, but is that really such a big deal?

B: I mean, she opened the door in the movie.

You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.

What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?

Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.

I'm gonna finally put a stop to the fucking drama. I saw people bullying other people for years; Gwen was not the only one. No longer will I put up with this. No longer will newcomers. For God's sake, just do jokes! Please! If you want to bully someone, do it in your family! You people don’t even know each other, but we're still going through this same fucking shit every fucking day! Just make jokes, people! That is why it’s called “Worst Jokes ever” not “Bully people forever.” So shut the hell up and get to joking! Jesus! The only reason why I came here was to spread jokes and kindness like Gwen and others, not to spread hate and foolishness from people who don’t even know better things to do but to hate on stupid strangers from different parts of the fucking world!!!

“Addison, fuck off already, you're only 10 years old. What do you know?” I might be 10, but during my time here, the tragedies and horror I've experienced on this website have shaped me into someone more mature, able to share this wisdom. And if you're gonna laugh at me, spit in the face of me and my generous teachings, you will fall. I swear to God, I will make you wish you could never feel pain. But that would hurt me more than you. Please, stop the drama. That's all I ask. Together, we can make this website great again, like it once was.