But jokes

I didn't break my back in the accident, thankfully.

But I can break yours today, hopefully.

Roses are red, violets are blue, Polo G is the goat, but that means nothing to you.

When a clock goes forward, it goes "tic-tac," but when Rommel goes backwards, it's tactic.

Time flies by, doesn’t it?

But the plane in 9/11 didn’t.

When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.

The doctor said I would make it, but then Spider-Man came in holding a PS5.

What do the Twin Towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, but now it's a sensitive subject.

I hate it when a couple has a minor quarrel, and the girlfriend updates her Facebook status to ‘single.’

I mean, I fight with my parents all the time, but I never update my status to ‘orphan.’

There are 206 bones in the human body, but I’d really like to have 207.

I’m not a weatherman, but I’m expecting a few more inches tonight.

I went up to an orphan bully and I said, "Here, look, I made a website!"

The orphan likes it, but the kid says, "I forgot one feature, though... the home button."

So one time I was with my girlfriend, crazy, right? But we were doing a TikTok eye follow challenge, and she pulled up a pic of Gwen Stacy from Into the Spider-Verse, and I looked somewhere I shouldn’t have, and she smacked me, and I changed to the Rock, and you know where she looked? WTF, right in the no-no square, and since she was a girl, all I could do was sit back and watch.

One day a man buys a rope to commit suicide, but his friend stops him.

They go to a school with lots of happy kids. The guy feels better after a mag.

A depressed man buys a gun for suicide, but then thinks, "maybe I shouldn't be doing this," and asks a friend for help. He returns with a rope.

I used to hate foot fungus, but now it's growing on me.

Your Roblox friend counts to 10, but she doesn't count to "too." Then Roblox says: "Damn. Your Roblox friend can't count."

I just overheard this but:

How do you make a party in space?

You planet.

Why were the people on the World Trade Center so pissed?

People, they ordered pepperoni pizza, but they got plane.

what do baby’s and grenades have in common?

They both are silent but then when thrown at someone make a loud noise

She responds: “See that man over there with no arms? Tell him to clap.”

The kid replies: “But, Mom, I’m blind!”

Mom: “Exactly.”