Business jokes
What does Stephen Hawking have in common with Bill Gates? One stands, the other doesn't.
Farmer's Wife: Honey, where are the cows?
Farmer: Up in the mountains grazing.
Farmer's Wife: Why?
Farmer: I don't know, but the steaks have never been higher.
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
Why did the rapper become a banker?
Because he wanted to make some BIG BANK DEPOSITS!
What store is the most public?
Publix!
Life's stupid
The companies that made the hand gel sanitizer must be absolutely rubbing their hands together!
Q: What do you call an emo business? A: A cutting board.
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account? They were prime mates.
Person: "How many people have you had intercourse with?"
Me: "Nun."
What did 1 pay with at the store? A 1/4 ;)
What's an orphan's least favorite store to go to?
Home Depot.
What's the quickest way to get to the hospital? Just stand in the middle of a busy road.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
What do my dad and Nemo have in common? They both can't be found.
What do you do after raping a deaf person? Cut their fingers off so they don't tell anyone.
MORE JOKES COMING SOON LMAO ;]
An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer. The second orders half a beer. The third orders a third of a beer. The bartender bellows, "Get the hell out of here, are you trying to ruin me?"
Which company likes Jesus the most?
IHS Markit!
What's an Indian's favorite store?
Red Dot.
What do you call a Panera Bread marking a test?
A Panera grade.
A duck walks into a bar and buys everyone a round. He tells the bartender, “Put it on my bill.”
How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?
He CRACKed up.
Why can't orphans work at S. C. Johnson? Because it's a family company.
New business idea: let's put a KFC in Africa and a watermelon shop.