Body jokes

What happens when you have dry elbows at work?

You don't have any elbow grease to put into it.

How does a skeleton call his friends?

On the tele-bone!

Little Johnny is with his dad behind a garbage truck when a dildo thumps the windshield.

To protect Little Johnny's innocence, he says, "That was an insect."

Little Johnny replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"

I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.

Your dad is so f**king fat that when he bends over and comes back up, it's the next day.

Alpha Kenny body?

It's easy to tell if a skeleton is lying to you because you can see right through them.

You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.

Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.

There are 206 bones in the human body.

207 when I'm at a nursery.

Where can a gay male that is abled bodied find the location of a glory hole if he is looking for a free and anonymous blowjob from another gay male?

From a physically disabled gay male who is either at the gym 💪 💪 🏋️‍♂️ or at the rest area ♿️ 🚹 🚽.

What does the word circumcise mean?

Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.

Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.

You have a father figure.

People ask me, "Are you an organ donor?"

"Yeah, over my dead body!"

Yo mama so fat when someone asked her to touch her chin, she asked, "Which one?"

Wanna see my pp again?

Yo mama so stupid, she put a battery up her a** and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"

One time, I was working this steamroller when the guy who I squashed farted.

I guess that’s what you call “FLAT”ulence.

Why did the dwarf laugh when he walked on the field?

The grass was tickling his balls.

Wow, you did 10 chin-ups? Was it 1 for each chin?