Body jokes
What do you call a dick with three eyes?
Preston.
My nuts hurt; if you pull them, I will scream.
My nuts tickle; scratch them, and I won’t like you no more.
Me: I have the body of a 28 year old.
Her: Prove it.
Me: (opens freezer)
Why is Dawayne so small? Because his parents cut him up into small slices!
One tonsil said to the other tonsil, “We must be in San Juan Capistrano, here comes another swallow.”
Memes
Why can't orphans go on field trips?
They don't have anybody to sign the form.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Yo forehead so angled, your mom could walk up.
So fat you're a scale said, "Fat ass."
I told my sister that when you go to bed with an itchy butt, you're going to have smelly fingers in the morning, and I've never heard her laugh so hard in my life.
What did the funny bone say to the skin?
"You're not humerus, I am!"
Bob has no arms.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
"It's not Bob."
Zack Stargaze has a small willy, lol.
What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?
They both have red circles on their bodies.
Yo mama so fat, when she touched the stairs, it said, "To be continued!"
Why do physically disabled gay men like performing blowjobs on well-endowed, abled-bodied gay men?
Because physically disabled gay men prefer eating pepperoni than eating sausage links for dinner 🍽
How do you get a smoking hot body as a senior?
Cremation.
I had a steering wheel down my pants, and I tell you what, it was driving my balls crazy!
I just had sex...
I think I nailed it!
(Shit joke, I know.)
Your mum is so fat that she took a spoon to the supercool.