Body jokes
A guy is at home and he's about to go get a physical at the doctor's office. When he gets there, the doctor says, "Brian, you're going to have to stop masturbating." He asked the doc why? The doc said, "So I can examine you!"
You know, it's only considered murder if there's a body. Otherwise, it's just a missing person.
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.
Your forehead got a restraining order from your hairline.
Josh Dalton once ate his shoulder.
What do you call an ear that's dead? Deaf. Hahaha! Oh wait...
Like if you have a dick, or you are an orphan.
Whenever my artist girlfriend is sad, I let her draw things on my body.
I gave her a shoulder to crayon.
Your forehead is so big, when you go to the toilet, it bends. You stooped.
There's something on your chin. No, not that one, the third row.
What body part do pigs have that humans don’t have?
A hambone.
What do you call a Down syndrome kid who has been physically abused by older teenagers and her parents for a total of 16 years and has red marks all over their body?
Not funny because Down syndrome jokes aren't funny ;)
Yo mama so fat that when I banged her in the jacuzzi, there was a level 8 tsunami.
Willies.
Your hairline is so bent, not even NASA can find it.
Bob has no arms.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
"It's not Bob."
Face-Timing My Girlfriend:
"Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick!" *shows muscle*
Imagine a dragon 🤔.
Imagine me dragging these nuts across your face.
I finally know why my brain doesn't work!
On the left side, there's nothing right, and on the right side, there's nothing left.
I've been looking for my parents for years.
For the life of me, I can't remember where I hid their bodies.