Body jokes
What part in the body does an adult not need but actually needs to live?
A KIDNey!
"Balls in Jack, Jack has balls in his mouth."
I always felt like a man trapped in a woman's body. But then I was born.
But in my defense, I was young then, and I had a womb without a view.
Your mum's got big tits.
This is not a joke, but if your uncle tells you, "Bend over, touch your toes, I'll show you where the monster goes," don't do it, hehehehehe.
Q: Do you know why people don't like abortion jokes?
A: Because they leave people with a feeling of emptiness inside.
So, my best friend's boyfriend broke up with her, and she started to cry.
So I told her a "single" joke, then she said, "Go and fucking die, you insensitive bitch!"
I later said, "Ugh, fine, as your BFF, I will break his body for you—happy now?"
She said, "*sniff* yes."
Clit
They say masturbation is better with a dead arm. Apparently, I ruined that funeral.
Your mama is so fat, when scientists discovered her, they thought it was a new galaxy.
Your dick is as flat as your grandma's heart rate.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms.
Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
When was the last time you could see your whole body in the mirror?
What do most disabled people eat?
Their arm.
If Red gets voted out, what happened?
Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"
Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"
Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"
Lime, Green, and Purple run.
Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.
Black killed Red. Black is the win.
LOL
Yo body so plastic that a turtle could choke on your peeled skin!
When they walk in and you're fucking... everyone at the morgue.
As a son, I am so worried about the phone call message that my mom got from a member of The CDC. It was on speaker, so me and mom both hear. The message told my mom that she needs to personally isolate because two of the new symptoms is having big titties and a great personality.
My friends hate when I make skeleton jokes. I guess I need to put more backbone into it.