Body jokes
What do you do if your dick is smoking?
Get your mum to lick it.
Yo mama is so fat when she goes to the dentist, they make her lay face down.
What do you call a skeleton with no bones? A boneless boy.
My wiener's small.
What has a tail, a head, but no body?
A coin.
I'm jealous of your heart because it's pumping in you and I'm not.
How does a booty stay in shape?
It works its glutes off!
Q: What did the man say after removing another man's hat? A: He was decapitated.
Your forehead is so big I could use it to get free TV.
What's a good way to masturbate?
Get somebody to do it for you.
Sans: haha... Paps: what? Sans: i KNEW it was gonna rain today. Paps: that's nearly impossible, how? Sans: i could feel it in my bo- Paps: OH MY GOD STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What is 6 inches tall when bricked up and is loved by women?
A strong man’s biceps.
What is the difference between a Rubik’s cube and a penis? I don’t know, but they both get harder the more you play with them.
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
You're so fat you can't see your penis when you piss.
Spare.
You got a spare, spare me an inch of that far juicy cock.
Unbelievable! When doctors touch my body, it’s alright, but if I do the same to some lady, apparently it’s "harassment!"
What has four legs and one arm? A Doderman in a playground.
Your forehead is so deep, not even curry can shoot from that deep.
Where are fart bombs made?
Old people's arses!