Body jokes

My BALLS itched when I crashed the plane.

Your mom is so fat that she made the earth flat.

Yo mama so FAT...

That when she had sex with you...

Your balls turned to pancakes.

Guy 1: "Stop looking at my ass!" Guy 2: "I said look at Uranus." Guy 1: "I'm looking at uranus!" Guy 2: "I said Uranus like the planet!" Guy 1: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.

You're so skinny, you can hula-hoop with Fruit Loops!

Yo momma is so old, she farts dust!

Yo momma is so fat, her bellybutton gets home 15 minutes before she does.

Is your ass jealous of the amount of shit that just came out of your mouth?

It's tiring being straight 24/7.

When you see someone with a double chin that’s sad:

Hey come on, man, keep your chin up. Wait, which one?

Your forehead is so big, John Cena could wrestle on it.

Yo mama is so fat, she can’t even fit in the suitcase.

Damn bro, that calculator is looking hot today. It got abs!

My bf: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

My bf: Ice cream.

Me: Ice cream who?

My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!

Hey, what are those things on your arms? They look like cuts. Wait, what? No, it's just marker. Nothing else...

Son: Dad, I need a new butt.

Dad: Why, son?

Son: Because mine has a huge crack in it.

I was stark nude. Hehe, I was. I truly and sincerely was.

The nurses giggled and said, "Joseph, why the hell is your wiener so loving?"

My penis purred and stroked their hands. I laughed and said, "I do not know."

Why does Blake like lakes? Because of cake!

What do you call a girl with one leg? Ilean.