Body jokes

I like Little Johnny's tight booty cheeks.

Guy 1: "Stop looking at my ass!" Guy 2: "I said look at Uranus." Guy 1: "I'm looking at uranus!" Guy 2: "I said Uranus like the planet!" Guy 1: "Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh"

I was stark nude. Hehe, I was. I truly and sincerely was.

The nurses giggled and said, "Joseph, why the hell is your wiener so loving?"

My penis purred and stroked their hands. I laughed and said, "I do not know."

Why does Blake like lakes? Because of cake!

My bf: Knock knock.

Me: Who's there?

My bf: Ice cream.

Me: Ice cream who?

My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!

Did you hear that Uranus is cracked?

Son: Dad, I need a new butt.

Dad: Why, son?

Son: Because mine has a huge crack in it.

Hey, what are those things on your arms? They look like cuts. Wait, what? No, it's just marker. Nothing else...

What do you call a girl with one leg? Ilean.

My girl got mad at me last night for saying to my mom that she had a dildo ready at all times and is always hard, so my mom wanted to see. So I whipped out my penis and my mom said it’s bigger than your dad’s!

What do you say when your friend has an ankle sprain?

"Damn bro, you got an ankle spring!"

What do you call a crappy circumcision?

A rip-off.

Lol, I have a teeny black dick.

What's the difference between a gay guy and an oven?

An oven doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

Teacher: *calls you up to the board*. You: Ok. *Gets intense boner* *has to fart really bad* You: F***!!!!!!!

Jack and Jill went up my ass to eat a big dildo, but Jack died cause he got hit by a brown thing.

Zion is so fat that his dick can't even fit in his wife's pussy.

I go to Venus to get a bigger penis.

Little Timmy said, "I had a body, eieio, now you are next!" as he shoots you.

What did one cheek say to the other cheek?

"It is a squash in here!"