Body jokes
Why did the girl never go upstairs?
Because she had no legs.
Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms!
A man woke up from a serious surgery. He screamed, "Doctor! Doctor! I can't feel my legs!" And the doctor replied, "I know. I amputated your arms."
How did I know where you would go next?
Oh, I felt it in my bones!
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone!
Why are skeletons so calm?
Because nothing gets under their skin.
What did the guy with two hands say to the guy with one hand?
"Hi-five!"
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Yo mama so fat that she should be worried for her health and go see a doctor.
These are ear-retcal jokes...
Fail.
The sky never changes color, but when it does, we know how your breath is increasing.
Confucius say, "man who go to sleep with itchy bum, wake up with smelly finger."
Vagina jokes aren't funny.
Most of the time.
Why do women rub their eyes in the morning?
Because they don't have balls.
What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
Oral sex will make your whole day. Anal sex will make your hole weak.
What do you call a nose without a body? -- Nobody knows.
What has a bottom at the top?
Your legs.
What is the most sensitive part of a man's anatomy while he's masturbating?
His ears.
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
My penis was in the Guinness Book of World Records. -- Then the librarian told me to take it out.