Birth Jokes

You’re forehead so big when you were being born the doctors thought you had no face

I was gonna say when you were born your mum saw you and screamed but I remembered you were adopted...

What do you get when you mix birth control and LSD? A trip without kids.

whats the difference of your birth and 911 one was planed

My father is like Houdini, when he heard his girlfriend was pregnant he disappeared.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

My dad told me that his dreams were shatterd a few years ago

Then i asked him how many years ago

He replied with ”when were you born?”

All normal sized babies a delivered by stork.

Heavier babies are delivered by crane.

the biggest inconvenience in 2001 i thought was my brother turns out it was 9/11 i guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was aluh aluckbar

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Amal". The other goes to a family in Spain, who name him "Juan". Years later Juan sends a picture of himself to his mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal. Her husband responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again? Little Johnny: I had to be their for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints)

Made by Evie and Peyton and Peyton’s Mom

Once upon a time, fraternal twins, brother and sisters, with almost 100% equal DNA were separated at birth. At the age of 42, they were married, had 2 sons and 2 daughter. They took an ancestryDNA test, and the results were scientifically sexually shocking.

What did hitler get for his 6th birth day???

A KEWsy burger and an easy bake oven

Y is it everyone wants to rub a pregnant woman stomach but never the man's balls where the baby actually came from and the real ones that deserve the congratulations