Biology

Biology jokes

Mosquito

God creates a mosquito :)

God: Okay, so make it reeeeally tiny. Like less than half a fly.

Angel: okay... a bug.

God: now give it’s face a sword, but it has a hole so it’s basically a mouth.

Angel: weird... but okay...

God: and give it wings.

Angel: eh, not half bad Go-

God: NOW MAKE IT EAT THE BLOOD OF ALL LIVING ANIMALS AND HUMANS

Angel: *shook* o-okay

God: okay. Now make sure whenever a human is bit it feels the pain of a million suns burning it, making it scratch until it bleeds out.

Angel: .-.

God: and make sure it also transfers diseases through the species. Give ‘em a taste ‘o that! *evil grin*

Angel: *cries*

Angel: *whispers; I’m so sorry..*

Egg

How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.

Orphan

What’s the difference between apples and orphans?

One of them has a family tree.

Mama

Yo mama so FAT...

That when she had sex with you...

Your balls turned to pancakes.

Snake

Q: What did one snake say to the other?

A: Nothing because they are both dead.

DNA

Q: What did the DNA say to the other DNA?

A: Do these genes make my butt look fat? 💩

Yo mama

Yo mama's so stinky that whenever she walks into a building, the flies drop dead!

Fish

If there are 12 fish and 6 drown, how many are left?

12, because fish don't drown.

Difference

What is the difference between a human and a tree and yyyyy night I can drive yyy earth 🌏?