Why do penguins carry fish in their beaks?
Because they don’t have pockets. I’m
People are like sharks; only the great ones are white.
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk.
What is the definition of a woman?
A life support system for a vagina.
What did the flower say to the crazy peanut?
"Ur going nuts boii, get back on yo' plant. Ur too nuts for me."
What do you call it when a lizard can’t get a boner?
Ereptile Dysfunction!
How do you tell if a loaf of bread has Down Syndrome?
It has an extra crumb-osome.
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
What did one brain cell say to the other brain cell?
"I think I feel a connection!"
What is a tree's favorite thing to drink?
Root beer.
What do you call an orphan fish?
Self-ish.
Suicide: Turning one's biology into complex organic chemistry.
What turns green, purple, and white? A chameleon.
How many times do you tickle an octopus to get it to laugh?
Ten-tickles!
Do you know what the similarity between a penis and cucumber is?
They both have cum in it.
Why did the butt let out a fart?
Answer: To wipe out humanity!
Who is king of the insects?
The Monarch.
Why is the koala not a bear?
It doesn't have the right koalafications.
Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.
Why does a giraffe need such a long neck?
Because its head is so far away from its body.
