Being jokes
I have double standards: burn a body at a crematorium and you're being a respectful friend; do it at home and you're destroying evidence.
Me: I will rape you!
Woman: NOOOOOO!!! I AM TOO SCARED TO GET "RAPED"!
Why do women be like this?
Could a phone booth also be called a chatterbox?
I was being interviewed by Elon Musk. He asked, "Where are you from?" and I said Portugal. He replied, "So you are a fellow countryman of a Pen merchant whose freekick ball broke my rover on Mars. Get out!!" Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Penaldo, for costing me my dream job!
Are you a plane? Because I wanna be in control of you for a few hours.
"Texas be like it's cold over here over here."
Texas be like, "We vote to freeze ourselves!"
Texas be like everything is bigger here: guns and winter storms!
The best part about having autism is being able to make jokes about genociding autistic people and no one can say a damn thing.
Why did the policeman rape the woman? Because he thought rapists wouldn't be attracted to non-virgins.
Women be like if men are gone, Earth would be a better place, (forgetting) women help to create war, weapons, animal and human cruelty, and have helped to enforce laws that oppress them.
Women be like men should pay for first dates, then get mad when you do...
Women be like chivalry is dead, then don't say thank you when you open the door for them.
Women be like, "Equal rights, equal pay," then decide that they don't want to do labor intensive jobs.
Women be like, "Porn is how we get money," then get angry when boys treat women like shit because they seen it on porn.
Women be like men are trash, [but] forgets women raised those men.
Women be like men cause wars, [but] forget men fight those wars while they fake cry.
Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.
Women be like, "Don't say that about her genitals," then makes fun of men's genitals.
Women be like, "Don't body shame," then goes to body shame men's heights.