Behavior jokes
Why do people call priests "Father"?
Because it’s too suspicious to call them "Daddy."
I was checking my shoe in my dad's wallet, and he slapped me. What exactly did I do to warrant the slap?
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose 👃, but you can't pick your friends' noses 👃 👃 👃.
I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.
Gwen, you need to shut up, for once!
You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friends' noses.
Does it cycle now? 🚲
"Sonic Says", "If you're ever bored and have nothing to do, then just punch an orphan in the face. Who are they gonna tell? Their parents?"
"Jordan, motherfucker, your face looks like a slut, and your life is trash. Stop picking on kids and LEAVE THEM HELL ALONE!"
Mom: It's time for sleep.
Baby: Is that what you think, huh?
Mom: *gives baby pacifier*
Baby: Nice try, hobo.
Mom: Well, I'll come back later to see if he's gone asleep.
*few hours later*
Baby: *still awake*
Mom: Why IS HE NOT ASLEEP?!
Baby: Lol, I told you nice try haha.
What screams I’m insecure?
Why should old women never eat seafood?
'Cause then she'll start acting crabby.
For all the online haters on me, comment here, be honest.
Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.
Walk into the club like, "Wow, I got a big penis!"
People's music when friends are around: *rock*
When they are gone: "Come on, vamanos, everybody let's go!"
Why do you want me?
Cus u like me...
What do you mean?
You love me.
No.
Look down.
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
If the average male walks 1.7 miles a day, then why did my dad take 13 years to get the milk?
Why can't a little girl fly? She doesn't have the proper motivation.
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.