Behavior jokes
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it leaves and never comes back...
Little Jonny fucked his mum.
My uncles like the moon.
He comes out at night.
How do you catch an elephant?
Act like a peanut.
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
Straight men change their girlfriends like they change their undies. So, about once a month.
Why should old women never eat seafood?
'Cause then she'll start acting crabby.
Why can't an orphan be a bully? Because they don't have parents.
Americans leave without saying goodbye, and Russians say goodbye without leaving.
I was bullying an orphan, then I said, "What, you gonna run home and cry to your mom?"
Why do people call priests "Father"?
Because it’s too suspicious to call them "Daddy."
One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out.
"I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂
Why did the emo kid not cross the road?
He was waiting for a car.
Your mom is so stupid, she thought eating ass was cannibalism.
Stop copying each other, fucking losers!
If you’re ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
Why did the cheetah get in trouble at school?
Because he cheated on a test.
Hey guys, I have a question.
Doesn't everyone's parents tell them don't take candy from strangers? Then what is Halloween?
What's the difference between a cheater and your mom?
They both cheated!