Behavior jokes

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

One day, inexplicably, my talking parrot started insulting me. He called me an idiot, a fool, a jerk, stupid, and a variety of other nasty names. I warned the squawker to cease, but to no avian avail. Fed up, I finally flipped the foul-mouthed feather-brain into the freezer...but after about 15 seconds, I relented and let him out.

"I'm so sorry," he declared! "I don't know what came over me, and realize I shouldn't have said those terrible things. I hope you can forgive me, and I promise never to do it again! By the way...what did the chicken do?" 🐔😂

What do orgasms and impulses have in common?

I don’t care if they have either of them.

The emo kid said, "I wanna die." But the quiet kid said, "Nah, I'm gonna die myself, bye!"

So imagine bullying an orphan so bad they cry, and then you say, "What are you gonna do, tell your parents?"

You know how divers jump off a cliff and land in the water well...

Emos do that too, but when they jump, they don't land in the water.

Your mama is so stupid, Patrick Starr ran away because he thought she might be contagious.

If you were to drop an emo and a leaf off a tree, who would hit the ground first?

The leaf, because the emo is always hanging.

I wrote a passage to stop about bullying, and it was easy. Do you know why?

Because I am a bully!

Women be like don't tell me what to wear, proceeds to tell men what to wear.

You're so skinny you're a thin stick.

You're so fat that when you got in Pacific Ocean, you became the Pacific Ocean.

You're so ugly you got stuff for free.

You're so nasty that when you eat spaghetti, you thought it was throw up.

You're so fat you're the fattest person on Earth.

You are so gay you kissed the boy last night.

I was bullying a little kid for having a purple eye and said, "Where'd you get that? Your mom? Your dad?"

After that, everyone in my group was laughing at the kid. The next day I never saw him again.

When you're mean to the quiet kid in your class and he kills everyone, good times.

If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: Because chickens are mindless creatures and do not know any better.

Why did the fastest cat get kicked out of school?

He was a cheetah.

Some of you need to go to church. I don't want you in hell with me.

"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."

So yesterday, I was at an orphanage, harassing children by twerking at them.

They burst into tears.

I was worried that they would call their mom, well... um... I got away.

Is it just me, or do these gays need to leave me alone?