Behavior jokes
Why did the cheetah get in trouble at school?
Because he cheated on a test.
If you're feeling mad, punch an autistic kid. What's he gonna do, blabber to the teacher?
My teacher asked the class to stand up if you're dumb. No one did, so she said, "Come on, someone must be dumb," and pointed over to the left side of the classroom. Lil Jonny stands up. "Do you think you're dumb, Lil Jonny?" asked the teacher. "No, I just feel bad for you. You're the only one who stood up," replied Lil Jonny!
What do gum and guns have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend all of a sudden.
If someone's debating the speed of light and a drunk Russian, the Russian would take speed to grab a falling wallet.
Aliens
Stop copying each other, fucking losers!
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their mummy?
Someone asked me what the lines on my wrist were from. I answered, "My cat has OCD."
Jimmy watched in horror as Alex told the suicidal man to do a flip.
What would a heterosexual woman that is a whore do for $500.00 that a gay man would be willing to do for free for a heterosexual man at a glory hole?
Suck his big cock.
There once was a man that wanted to join a group of right-handed men, but he wrote with the other hand. He got left behind.
My puns drive people nuts; this is usually when I bolt away.
What do a gay man and a tumbleweed have in common?
They blow and blow until they wind up on a fence in Wyoming.
We can nip March Madness in the bud, but only if we detect the warning signs of brooding, anti-social February Fever.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It just felt like it.
What’s the hardest part about being a pedophile?
Fitting in.
Why did the chicken cross the road to get away from this conversation?
OK, guys, quick update, what is going on with Freshfry, Drew, and Alya?
All they're doing is fighting, and I want to put an end to it. So Freshfry, Drew, and Alya all need to read this, OK. First, Freshfry, you should've just said OK the first thing he said, and Drew... really? You had to keep egging him on. I don't know about Alya, but it's like cats and dogs fighting. Just please stop fighting :(
I be ready to commit suicide.
But when it comes to jumping out my window, I'm scared ash.