Attraction jokes
You're so clapped that you make Susan Boyle attractive.
Guy: Are you tired?
His “Crush”: No.
Guy: Are you sure, because you’ve been running through my mind all day?
His “Crush”: That’s sweet.
Guy: I’m joking, you don’t look like you do any running.
I carried a magnet, then people found me very attracting.
Me: You have pretty eyes.
Her: Thank you.
Me: I can make them roll back 😈🥴
Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got "fine" written all over you.
Real
If you were a fruit, you’d be a ‘fine-apple.’
If I had a nickel for every time I saw someone as beautiful as you, I’d still only have five cents.
Do you know what's lonely?
Your lips, wanna meet mine?
Did you sit in sugar?
Because you've got a sweet ass.
How to trick a gay man into having sex with a woman?
Take a dump on her vagina!
Let’s try and make this joke the most liked and commented on this website. (Ps, you may need to say it out loud to get it.)
I went to a zoo and there were no people and there was one dog. It was a shih tzu.
By day I like girls, by night I like boys, but you, I wouldn’t like you at dusk or dawn.
When the guy asks the girl if she's wet, she replies, "Yeah, milky knickers!"
Three people having sex is a threesome; two people is a twosome. So next time someone calls you "handsome," don't take it as a compliment.
penis.
I like penis.
Lesbian stands for:
L: Loving
E: Extra
S: Shitty
B: Bitches
I: I
A: Am attracted to
N: Nice girls.
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
One time a kid came to the hospital and said, "I really need help." The kid said he was really hot, so they put an ice cold towel on him.
Then the doctor asked him if he had any problems, and he said, "Yes, I am really hot." The doctor realized that he looked fine, so he said, "Are you sure? You look amazing." And the kid said that he meant to say, "I look hot!"
Animals are just... so hot!