Asked Jokes

I asked my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middleschool.

Kid 1: I like you! Do you like me? Kid 2: No. You never asked if I love you! Kid 1: Aw, do you love me? Kid 2: No!

Orphan: asks you random joke what is the difference between my bomerang and my parents Me: the boomerange came back

imagine this: u at math class. Teacher asks you “wut 11*11”. You say “120”. Teach syas “wrong!” You say “how off was I?” Teach says “1” me rn: REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WHERES THE RAGE TABLE or smth liek tht

I saw a girl crying I asked her where her parents were and she started to cry even more man, I love working in the orphanage.

Farrah Fawcertt, upon arriving at the pearly gates, god asked her, for having lead such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe. Five hours later, Michel Jackson died.

Priest walks outside and finds two young boys sitting on a big ice cube... priest asks what are you guys doing the boys answer the priest always likes a couple of cold ones before he goes on

DUDE all Hitler ask for was a glass of juice, but every one misheard him.

my friend asks me what does idk mean i said i dion't knowm my friend says you mean i don't know i said thats what i said

I asked "Mom what's that in the sky?" Mom replied with, "thats your father".

One late night, my wife caught me standing in front of the freezer.

She asked me, "What are you doing?"

I replied "I'm making a pink yeti."

She asked "What does that mean?"

I said "I left our kid in the freezer for a couple hours."

I asked my dad, "are we there yet" and he told me "don't worry son it will be a short ride"

I asked my class what comes before 47 everyone said 46 except for the quiet kid who sad ak

All of a guys son's came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar. The bartender asks "Do u have anyone in ur family who likes women?" The man said "My wife does!"

I saw that my brother has brain cancer, so I asked him: "Are you big brain?"

So a kid was crying...I asked him what was wrong

I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE!!!

What's worse than a failed suicide you ask? I fail suicide cuz you forgot to do the dishes and ur parents come after you and they're the ones to kill you not yourself