Ares jokes
What's the difference between cake and pie?
πr2, cakes are round.
Why can you slap an orphan?
Are they going to tell mommy?
Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend.
Friend: Wow thanks, I'm rich!
Robin [narrows eyes]: You're what?
Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, what happened to you?
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats: My dog is named Curiosity, and your cat is dead.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Little Johnny is smokin' hard, The sun looks like Mountain Dew.
Russia and Ukraine are running a marathon. Who do you think won? Russia did. Russia gave Ukraine a migraine.
A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals.
Do you like Wendy's? When deez nutz are in your mouth.
You can't be short and depressed because you are compressed.
It was dinner in the plane, and the flight attendant asked the passenger if he would like dinner.
"What are my choices?" the passenger said.
"Yes or no," the flight attendant replied.
Are you corona? Cuz it’s hard to breathe around you ;)
I arrived at work and saw a kid crying. I walked up to the kid and asked, "Hey, where are your parents?" and the kid just cried more. God, I love working at an orphanage.
Why is the Z the only politically correct letter?
Because all the other letters are not Z's.
Did you know "bj" ends with "job" because if you are giving a man a blow job, it sucks? But if you’re giving it to a woman, it's called "eating out" because it’s a privilege.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Jets versus towers, USA lost two.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, there's always someone who's better than you.
Yo mama so stupid, she said, "Where are my gifts?" on Father's Day.
These days, there are only two political parties in India: BJP and anti-BJP.
A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.