Ares jokes
(Bus Driver) What did you learn in school today?
(Kid) We learned that you are a sussy baka.
(Bus Driver) Oh yeah? Well, I quit!
(Kid) Quit what?
(Bus Driver) Living.
(Kid) But it was a joke!
(Bus Driver) Doesn't matter. I will die, but you will still be alive.
(Kid) Ok.
(Bus Driver) That was a joke, too!
Why do men get great ideas in bed?
'Cause they are plugged into a genius!
Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.
Virgos are always virgins to age 17... Just saying.
Why are school shootings branded “very American”?
1. They usually happen in the USA.
2. They’re like the Fourth of July: there’s a lot of loud banging and kids screaming.
Are you the Twin Towers? Because I would smash you.
Are you a fire alarm because you're loud and annoying?
Hi, I'm Nate. How are you guys doing?
Jorden Calerendiá.
I bet you are a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, by the way your roasts are not fucking funny they are bullshit like your face and your hairline.
We are all just suicidal kids telling other kids not to do it.
Are you Paris, 'cause Eiffel for you.
Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?
It's between cheeks at the moment.
Why are the Twin Towers mad?
They are like pepperoni and cheese as a plane.
"We are Number one."
Why are Black people getting stronger?
Because the TVs are getting bigger.
Like if you're gay.
Dislike if you are lez.
I saw a kid crying in the corner. I asked them where their parents are. Man, I love working at an orphanage!
Why are women like parking spots?
Because all of the good ones are always taken first, and you gotta wait until they're available again.
Did you know that most women are left-handed?
That’s because the majority of them don’t know what to do with rights.
The maid asked her boss, the wife, for a raise, and the wife was upset.
The wife asked, "Why do you think you deserve a pay increase?"
Maid: "There are three reasons. The first is that I iron better than you."
Wife: "Who said that?"
Maid: "Your husband."
Wife: "Oh."
Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."
Wife: "Who said that?"
Maid: "Your husband."
Wife: "Oh."
Maid: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."
Wife: "Did my husband say that as well?"
Maid: "No, the gardener did."
Wife: "So how much do you want?"