Ares jokes
On a scale from 1 to America, how free are you this weekend?
Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?
The black one... he's 13!
For some reason a group of emo kids are following me because I gave them a Happy Meal.
Your hairline is pushed back; we can see what you are thinking of.
Yo mama is so lazy that the only letters she knows are "NO".
Crit especially if you are a rouge
You are so white even Nippon Paint tried to sign you!
Kid: Which were me, are your parents?
Orphan: What are parents?
Me when people ask how old my girlfriends are:
"There's 2, there're 4, there're 6, there're 8."
Girls: Boys are like games, they're meant to get played.
Boys: Girls are like stones, the flat ones get skipped.
Why are there no Africans on cruise ships from Africa to America?
Once again, they don't fall for the trick!
Why doesn't Mexico win any medals in the summer Olympics anymore?
Because all the Mexicans that can run, swim, or jump are already here.
Yo mama is so fat, when she's walking down the street, there are cracks all over the sidewalk.
Friend: Hi!
Me: Who are you?
Friend: ...your friend?
Me: What are you talking about? The doctor already said I couldn’t have any.
If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.
Why are Nepalese bad at chess?
Because someone already killed their king!
Why can orphans not get married?
They are dad can't walk them down the aisle!
Name what guns are used for. {wrong answers only?}
Why are bees' hair always sticky?
Because they use a honeycomb...
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are probably built upside down.
Boyfriend: "Babe, are you traffic police?"
Girlfriend: "No."
Boyfriend: "Then why do you shout at me for not wearing a helmet?"