Appearance jokes
You're so ugly you make gay/lesbian people straight!
1. Your face is so ugly, I thought it was deformed. It probably was anyways.
2. Even if Donald Trump had time to build a wall, it was probably so you won't squish us with your fatass.
If someone says your face is deformed, just say that's what happens when I look at you.
Welcome.
Your hairline is so old, it’s more wrinkled than my great grandpa's penis.
Me: Looks like a girl, sure as h3ll I don't sound like one.
Michael Jackson: Looks like a boy, sure as h3ll don't sound like one.
That [is] what we have i[n] commen, but if you mix up my gender I won't give a F about it. Michael Jackson not so much : )
Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.
Memes
Your hairline goes so far back, your forehead got a six pack.
You're so skinny you never gain weight. You're so skinny you're a thin stick.
"Simon says touch your chin."
The fat people be like, "Which one?"
"G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it!"
Kid: You're so fat!
Other kid: At least fat can be changed, but your ugly face can't be.
What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!
It may be weird to let people smell your hair, but grab the phone as soon as the dwarf says your hair smells nice.
Your mom said I was ugly. I told her she couldn’t see her belly button because she was so fat. She said, “I thought I was the only one without one!”
Your forehead [is] so big [that] every time you shout, your forehead starts pulsing.
What do you call an ugly, grey thing?
Cinderelephant!
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?
A receding hare-line!
Why did the chicken not cross the road?
Because it saw your face!
You're so ugly that when you came out of the haunted house, you had a job offer.
Yo mama is so ugly, she makes the devil read the Bible.
Your mama is so ugly even the trolls threw up.