You're so ugly, when you put makeup on, it makes you look like a clown.
Appearance Jokes
You look like you're playing hide-and-seek with your hairline.
Your hairline is so far, too far, even dark humored jokes are scared of it.
Your hairline goes so far back, your mom is scared you're not going to make friends.
@ Kobe the person under my joke, your hairline is so bad that Kobe Bryant could've lived if he landed the helicopter on your forehead.
Y'all is ugly!
Ali A's face.
You're tiny!
I have a friend of mine from school. I always see them with bangs, so I never knew what their forehead looked like until one day they came... Their forehead was bigger than Mount Everest, that you can make an entire Olympics mountain climbing audition on that forehead! :)
So my ex, who wouldn't leave me alone because she thought I was the best person in the world even though Will has a better haircut than me, but anyway, when we broke up she said I was the worst person she ever met, and I told her she looks like a cross between a beaver and a mole rat.
Then I told her she has the Wendy's logo haircut and then some other things I'm not gonna say. 2 years of bullshit, I was done.
Anyways, she cried lol.
You're so skinny, if you take a bath you look like you're in an ocean. 🛀🏊♂️
My mother said I'm sexy. I said no, I have cancer.
Yo mama so fat, she got arrested for carrying 10 pounds of CRACK.
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.
Me: Imagine not having hair.
Kids: On chemo.
Bitch the fuck.
She saw me butt-naked, now she thinks I'm half Black.
A German priest went to America for a few months. Unfortunately for him, he did not speak the best English. He stayed with a beautiful, young single woman who worked at a nearby orphanage.
Every day, he visited her in the orphanage, and he always brought her small gifts, and of course to the young children.
The young woman thought the priest was flirting with him, and she knew he was not married. She left that thought in the back of her mind for a few weeks.
A few weeks later, she finally brought up her nerve to ask him. She asked him why he always visited her, and why all the gifts for her and the children.
Of course, due to his bad English, he struggled a bit with his sentence, but he said in his thick German accent, "Vell, I visit you and your, your littles, because the kind girls here are very beautiful and cute."
She was quite amused, and blushed a bit. The man was also a bit nervous, and appeared to want to leave her office.
The Priest then excused himself, and went to read the orphans a bedtime story.
He then muttered to himself, "Ach, she's catching on to me! Stupid! Zey are called little girls and boys, not child boys and girls."
Bell is so ugly, she acts like a boy.
If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents!
My question is, how do fat people fit in tuxedos? Honestly, don’t wear those. Wear your regular clothes. Your belly is just gonna pop out!
