ANS jokes

What do you call someone who is in an airplane crash who was a 2006 Stanley Cup champion with the Carolina Hurricanes?

Josef Vasicek.

How do you make a trash can leak?

Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!

What is an orphan's least favorite song? We Are Family.

What’s an orphan's favorite movie?

Spider-Man: No Way Home.

Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.

Why do you need an AR-15?

So my son can use it if he's being bullied at school.

Why can't an orphan be a criminal?

They aren't wanted.

What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.

I gave an emo kid money.

He gave me the great depression.

What do you call an army of autistic people?

Special forces!

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

Kid: What is an orphan's favorite breakfast?

Teacher: What?

Kid: Fruity Pebbles with water.

Teacher: Why water?

Kid: 'Cause his dad never came back with the milk.

What has two wings and an arrow?

A Chinese telephone. "Wing Wing Arrow!"

I am an actual police officer (Not gonna mention with which department in case they actually check this site) and tbh I find these jokes funny as fuck, carry on boys.

What do you call an STD?

Elenji.

What is the difference between an American and an orphan?

They don't have a home to get their guns.

What does an orphan have in common with an 80-year-old woman? Their parents will never come back.

There was a kid sitting in a corner.

Me: "Hey! Why are you here at an orphanage?"

Orphan: "..."

Me: "Oh, wait, you're an orphan."

Someone: "I got chickens out there vibin'."

Me: "What? Oh, you mean those over-sized chickens that just show an example of you in real life?"

Someone: . . .

If Stephen Hawking was an Xbox... he just red ringed and rose up to GameStop.