ANS jokes
What do you say to an emo with a new haircut?
"Nice cut, G."
In Home Alone, if the kid was an orphan, it would just be called "Alone."
Teacher: Everyone, tomorrow is bring your mom to school day.
Me: Sorry but my mom's not gonna make it.
Teacher: Why?
Me: I'm an orphan, bitch.
What is a pizza that an orphan can’t have?
A family pizza.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
The apple gets picked.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples get picked.
Shut the f*** up, I am an orphan!
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan?
Apples are picked.
What's an orphan's favorite sport?
Baseball, because that's the only time they can run home.
What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)
What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.
What's the difference between a bay and an onion?
I cry when I cut into an onion.
What is an owl that wears armor?
An orphan goes up to someone. The guy says, "Where are your parents?"
The orphan says, "Why do you think I'm wearing ripped pyjamas?"
Two kids were beating up a kid in an alley, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.
I'm in school lol.
Did you know that an orphan can take a selfie and a family photo at the same time?
What’s an orphan’s favorite holidays? Mothers’ and Father’s Day.
Hey guys, it's an alien!
What did an orange say the day before going to work?
"Back to the rind!"
Yo mama so stupid, she made an appointment with Dr. Pepper.
I don't want to date an alien.