Animal jokes
Why would you never donate to crabs?
Because they're shellfish!
There was a dino at the library today.
It was reading a thesaurus.
How do goldfish know when to eat?
They don't. They have a memory span of 3 seconds.
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.
What did the dog say to the other dog?
Memes
What do you call a goldfish that got third place? A bronze fish.
What's green then red all over?
A frog in a blender! :)
Dodo.
What turns green to red in a flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.
What do you call a dinosaur that can’t eat?
Anarexic.
Why did that fish cross the road?
Just for the halibut (hell of it)!
Why can't you play poker in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
Answer:
To prove it wasn't chicken!
What did the fish say to the other fish when it got hooked?
"That's what you get for not keeping your mouth shut."
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Worst joke ever.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to KFC.
Where did the cows go to a date?
To the moo-vies!
Did you hear about the new doggy condos?
Apparently they are now releasing!
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
Why are monkeys funny? Because they look weird.