Animal jokes
Why didn't the octopus get a tent? Because it had tentacles.
What do you call a cow who's personality is down to Earth?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow that fell up the stairs?
Ground beef.
What do you call someone who has sex with foals, calves, and lambs? A Quadrupedophile.
Why did the cow knock over Johnny?
Because the cow felt like to dumb.
Why do cows have babies?
They moo-ved together.
What do you call a lion as a baby?
Cocota
What are 8 people hiding in a corner because they're scared?
An octopus.
What happens if a boy bumps into a dog?
It’s a bumper team.
What do you get when you cross a pig with a cactus? A porkupine!
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's.
Why did the ducks go to jail?
They sold quack.
Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it only went halfway.
Why did the chicken cross the rooooo o oooad?
Why did the chicken cross the plane to get to the other skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lloooooooooooooooooooool?
Where did the cows go to a date?
To the moo-vies!
How do you turn your dog into a watchdog?
Get it a Rolex!
Why are monkeys funny? Because they look weird.
Vital information: if you find a stray dog in an alleyway, don't stare at its eyes.
Why did the crows form a charity?
Because it's all for good caws!