Animal jokes
What do crows get after they buy a phone?
A cawing card.
Why aren't dogs known as carrots? Because they aren't.
If I was a cow and could dance, I'd bust some moooooves while I uddered some lyrics!
Two fish in a bowl. First fish asks, "Haven't I seen you around here before?"
The second fish replies, "F**k me, a talking fish!"
A dog talks to another dog and says,
"Wow, you're a hot dog!"
Memes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
You sound like an owl.
Did you know China wanted to send a dog to space?
They didn't because they ate it.
What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?
One of them is actually loved.
What's the difference between the Twin Towers and a cow?
You can't milk the same cow for 15 years.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To cock-a-doodle die...
Why did the flamingo cross the road?
Because it was the chicken's day off.
A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.
The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"
Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"
Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?...
To get to the other side.
Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?
Idk.
What happened to the cheetah that took too many baths?
The cheetah became spotless!
What do lizards and Queen Elizabeth have in common?
They both live long with dry skin.
My favorite animal is a cheetah, so I hope the jokes are good.
Why do cheetahs have spots outside of their bodies?
Because they don't have them on the inside.
You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.
What is a fish without i's?
Fsh.