Animal Jokes

Before you leave that marriage, remember that one innocent 🐐 goat was killed for your traditional marriage. 😔

What do you call a rabbit with a big ass?

A BUNny.

What do you call a gangster involved with anime? A Cuz-Player.

Why did the hedgehog cross the road?

To see his flat-mate.

"Kylin milks me all day like I'm a cow."

A black car with paw prints on the hood. The text above the car reads: "I think a large frog was here maybe even a toad."

What do you call a suspicious dog?

A sussy bark-er.

A man went hunting with his son and shot an animal.

The father asks the son to identify the animal he just shot, and the son answers: "Holy Cow!"

Father: "What do you mean, 'Holy Cow?'"

Son: "You shot a hole in the cow, of course!"

Did you know China wanted to send a dog to space?

They didn't because they ate it.

Why did the chicken cross the road?...

To get to the other side.

What's the difference between an orphan and a dog?

One of them is actually loved.

You might think that tigers or lions are the best jumpers, but in my opinion, it's emos, because some of them are still in the air.

What is a fish without i's?

Fsh.

Why did the orphan go to the monkey exhibit?

To see his closest relatives.

A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"