Animal

Animal jokes

Cat

    • READ THIS OUT LOUD:

    This is this cat.

    This is cat.

    This is how cat.

    This is to cat.

    This is keep cat.

    This is an cat.

    This is idiot cat.

    This is a busy cat.

    This is for cat.

    This is forty cat.

    this is seconds cat.

    NOW- go back and read the third word from each line from the start.

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    • Whale

    • So, there was a male whale and a female whale swimming through the ocean. One day the male whale sees a ship and says, "That's the ship that killed my parents!" So they go to the ship and blow the ship over and throw the men overboard into the sea.

    The male whale sees the man who killed his parents and he was still alive, so he opened his mouth and went for the man, but out of nowhere the female whale yells, "Hey!! I was in it for the blowjob, but I'm not gonna eat seamen!"

  • 1
    • Animal memes

    Hoe

    • What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?

    A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."

  • 0

    • Necrophilia

    • Is it necrophilia if they die while you're having sex and you just don't realize?

    That's what happened to my dog.

  • 6

    • Baby

    • A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen! Ugh!”

    The woman goes to the rear of the bus and angrily sits down. She says to a man next to her “The driver just insulted me!”

    The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”

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    • Banana

    • Today I learned that on average, humans eat more bananas than monkeys.

    This is partially due to the fact that most humans don’t like the taste of monkey.

  • 5

    • Chicken

    • Went to my local Indian restaurant and asked the waiter for a chicken tarka Masala.

    The waiter said, "What's that?"

    I said, "It's the same as a tikka, just a little otter."

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