Animal jokes
What did the evil chicken lay?
Deviled egg.
"Dude come here and see a rabbit!"
"Ok!"
"Are you ok, man?"
"Yeah, I’m fine."
"Dude, pull your pants back up!"
Rooster.
What's the difference between a pig and a police officer?
The pig smells better.
Why did the koala cross the road to get to the other gum tree?
What do you call a three humped camel?
Why did the ducky get arrested?
He got caught selling quack.
Why do duckies wipe after they poop?
Their butt quack.
When I was 11, my mom came home from the bar super drunk that night, and I just wanted to know if they knew where the cat was because I heard a noise. We had a loooooooong talk the next morning.
Why did Mozart hate all of his chickens?
When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, “Bach, Bach, Bach.”
If an orphan was an animal, it would be an owl because they don't know "WHOOO" their parents are.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your mom's house.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Your new father!
What did the cat say when he got mad?
I'm hissed!
You are a fat pig.
You are so cat.
You are so blind, even a spider can see better than you.
You got a pig head!
Why did the chicken cross the rooooo o oooad?
A bird was on a branch at school today. I turn away to talk to my friends, and another bird was there when I turned around. I turn around again, and the birds are having fucking sex!!!
What the fuck.
Now I've seen everything.
Why are cheetahs not good at hiding?
They’re always spotted!