The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
How do lions đŚ like their steak?
"Roar!"
What do penguins wear on their heads?
Snow caps!
Q: What is a clownâs favorite fish?
A: The clownfish.
I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
What did the mother cheetah say to her cub?
"Go to bed or I'll slap your spots off you!"
What do you call a scared cow?
A COW-ard.
What did the fox say to the fire?
You look hot!
I tried to eat ass once. The donkeys got one hell of a kick!
What's a cow's strongest part of their body?
Their "calves"!
Dog: Woof!
Butcher: Say less.
My wife got mad at me because I took our life savings and brought golden retrievers.
Like, bitch, we can get gold because of these golden retrievers.
What's the difference between a sex slave and a goat?
I don't have a sex slave in my basement...
Guys, I'm back...
Here's my joke:
What is blue and red all over?
Blood in the water of a shark attack victim.
What do George Washington and a beaver have in common?
They both have eyes.
What is the difference between a puppy and a fork?
I donât microwave forks.
What is the best la?
A koa-la!
Why are cows such great dancers?
They have all the best moooves!
I jump off a cliff and said I hate you, dumb blond, and eagle...Then I said to my wife, "We're done, Blondie," and said to my friend, "You're a dumbhead eagle!"
